Friday, July 31, 2009

it would be so much nicer

if i had just a bit more money.

not working during the summer is nice, but sucks.
im always broke :[

plus i start school in about 17 days.
sooo not stoked about that.

what shall i do in the meantime?
hmmm... ;-)

spot on!

I completed the quiz "Which Disney Princess/Heroine are you most like?" with the result Aurora.
You are most like Aurora! You are a gentle person whos heart is overflowing with love. You are pretty shy around new people, but once they get to know you they find the most caring friend they could ever imagine. Nobody can complain about you, your just too sweet and kind. You care about your friends, family and even strangers so much that it is sometimes hard to keep your emotions in check. Your very idealistic and always have a dream, but sometimes can get too caught up in a perfect world. Be careful not to become too sensative or to have too high of expectations or the world around you might bring you down.

about me

taken from the owl diary [thanks, krissy!]
visit her blog, it's a treasure.

What thing, concept, philosophy, or idea do you wish someone had told you when you were younger?
Don't be miserable over lost causes. Love will find you.

Who/What has been your biggest influence?
I don't really have any... But I guess my old friends, good and bad, have shaped me.

When I was a kid, I wanted to grow up to be… a singer or an artist.

What silly thing are you scared of? Serious thing?
Swimming in dark pools. I'm afraid that there will be something in there that will try to get me.
Dying of a stroke/heart attack.

What's the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning?
Look at the time, maybe go back to sleep.
If I have to get up, then open my drapes.

My true passion is… singing, creating, and loving.

What is your secret guilty pleasure?
The Secret Life of the American Teenager.

Music today is…
I haven't listened to music today.
But in general, rock now is better than it was in the 80s.
Pop has gone downhill after Disney started hijacking it.
Haha I'll stick with my few obscure bands.

Fill in the blank: Flaws are… what make us different from others.

LA or NY?
I have never been to NY. I wouldn't know.

Mary Kate or Ashley?
Ashley. No illness and she's fashion savvy.

What is your favorite quote/motto/mantra?
“Dance as though no one is watching
Love as though you've never been hurt
Sing as though no one can hear you
Live as though heaven is on earth.”


The most life-changing book I have ever read was… Twilight? In a bad way, kind of. It gave me standards of what guys should be like and it's hard to get rid of them. :[

My secret or hate-to-admit-it crush is… Adrien Brody. He is old but he is fine!

My three favorite, can't live without them pieces of clothing or accessories are:
1. Black cardigan
2. Z. Cavaricci skinny jeans
3. Dangling earrings

My personal hero/idol is… I try to be my own. I don't really look up to anyone.

After my last relationship I felt…
This doesn't apply to me. I'm still in my first relationship.

The best new fashion trend is…
Skinny jeans, long sleeveless vests over tank tops, and layered sparkly chain necklaces.

My top three favorite bands/groups/singers are…
I have so many.

1. Three Days Grace
2. Imogen Heap
3. Scary Kids Scaring Kids

If I could suddenly inherit anyone's closet, I would choose… Idk. If they're skinny, the clothes probably wouldn't fit :[

My go-to karaoke song is… Whatever I feel like singing to.

It really pisses me off when… People don't treat you fairly.

I am never happier… Than when I get to sing. Particularly when driving fast along the beach with my windows rolled down and my music turned up loud.

How tall are you? 5'4"

How many languages do you speak? Which?
2: English and Spanish (not fluently, but well enough)
I know bits and pieces of French too.

The human ego is… like Krissy said, destructive.

When I get dressed, I'm usually thinking… I need to lose weight.

Where were you born?
Southern CA

What's the worst fashion crime one could possibly commit?

Wearing clothes so sheer that you see undies or bras. Eek!

My favorite website is…

My favourite store to shop at is… torrid. It's the only place.

Three foods I'll never get sick of… any kind of nachos, Thai noodles, sandwiches.

Love is… all we need to be happy.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Post kick out lyrics

I'm sad to say it, but I'm over you
Nothing has ever hurt more
This just isn't working, it never has
I'm sorry but I have to do it anyway

Say those words again and again
Say them in your head
Let me say them to you
And let's see how much you'll like me then

So I'll build you up to break you down
I'll claim my love to tear you to pieces
I know what this will do to you
There is just no other way

Say those words again and again
Say them in your head
Let me say them to you
Let's see how much you'll like me then

Tell me one thing,
Tell me this one thing
If we get the love that we think we deserve
Then why don't I remember wanting to hurt?

I'll say those words again
Let's see how much you'll like me then

last night was the worst.

i feel like complete shit.
last thursday i tried out for a band... my boyfriend's band.
i was all ready to not get in after my audition -- i prepared myself accordingly.
but, lo and behold, they liked me! after all that prepping for failure, i allowed myself to be happy.

it really isnt fair.
last night they kicked me out, saying that my voice clashed with the style.
besides the fact that i dont agree, im just upset that i didnt get a chance to save my spot.
they spoke about this behind my back through texts :[

i just wish i had a shot, you know?
like, i was finally happy because of music, and they had to take it away.
it's so unfair.

in their last band they gave the crappiest people second chances, warnings even.
i get none of that.
im not mean, and i worked hard.
we made a wonderful song.
i didnt even get a chance to put my vocals out there for other feedback.
they just believed what 1 of the bassist's friends say...

it's not fair :[

im sorry im whining but really, i just feel heartbroken.
this is the thing i wanted most, i wanted it so bad.

i wish they had given me a shot at it :[

Wednesday, July 15, 2009


my boy comes home today! im so happy!
i wont get to see him until tomorrow because he is going to be home around midnight but at least we'll be in the same time zone again!

aaaaaahhhh haha!
im so excited, it's ridiculous.


Wednesday, July 8, 2009

london time

okay so im in the process of redoing my room and i happened to have ordered a quilt online...
from a website based in the UK.
im in CA. this was not a smooth move on my part.
wellllll as it turns out, the damn thing is out of stock and theyre getting it in like 4/5 weeks from now.
ugh i hate waiting that long, but i hate the fact that they already took the $200 out of my bank account :[
and i have no idea if theyre going to rip me off or not.
im supposed to call them but the time difference is awful.
they're like 8 hours ahead. i think?
it's 11ish PM over here which makes it 7ish AM over there.
right? is that 8 hours? i cant count right now.
so i either have to wait until 1 AM to call which isnt gonna happen tonight, or i have to get up super early to call them during their business hours.
allllll to make sure im not getting ripped off, to see when the damn quilt is coming in and how much shipping is going to be.
a fnckin quilt!


no more ordering from the UK. that's my new motto :[

Tuesday, July 7, 2009


i couldnt fall asleep for the life of me last night.
i was up until about 530 would be a safe guess. :[
in order to fall asleep, i began thinking of random things that dont make much sense at all.
for example, baby names haha.
i absolutely love exotic and unusual names, but since i couldnt think of any last night, i chose to go with family names and try to make them pretty.
since i dont plan on having children soon, maybe i should just get a bunch of canaries and give them formal names haha :]

This is how they turned out:
Girl: Clara-Jean Belle
Boy: Zakky/Zak(k)ary Arthur

And then other names I like (i like some better than ^):

Girl: Aine (Anya/Anja), Celeste, Marina, Elizabeth, Rose, Alana, Ingrid, Melody, Delphine, Keely, Amaranth, Amarantine, Aveline, Aurora, Sunniva, Freya, Avalon (Avylon/Avylanna), Leah (Lya, Liah, Lia, Leigha), Leana, Kryssa, Keira, Skyla, Chyla, Gwenavire, Sapphire, Isla, Ivy, Kanga, Starleigh, Summer, Scarlette, Kahla

Boy: Derek, Chance, Alexander, Cedric, Constantine, Kegan, Pagan, Rylie, Rusty, Avalon, Skylar, Skye, Felix, Brody, Tristan, Bay, Ever, Erling, Fairleigh, Raleigh, Jack(?)

Yeah. I was bored haha.

and i just noticed that i go in and out with proper capitalization and apostrophes and stuff.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

one day down

i miss him.

p.s. new music to reflect the mood.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

my heart goes to michigan.

at 4 or 5 pm, my boyfriend is going to michigan with his family for 2 weeks.
for 2-3 years now we've been together for at least 3 or 4 times a week, if not more.
many times it's 5 or 6 times a week.
he's not going to have internet, and calling will probably be limited.
im so bad haha. look at me, he's not even gone yet and i miss him already.
it's only 2 weeks and im almost a mess about it.
pathetic? idk.
im always like that when he leaves for a week or more.
im going to have so much time on my hands. good in a way, but bad in the fact that too much time for me to do nothing increases the chances that im going to be a depressed lazy ass for the next two weeks, being on the verge of tears the whole time.


well, that's why ive decided to redo my room while he's away.
im painting my room bright green and getting a beautiful velvet turquoise quilt for my bed.
itll be an amazing change from my dark orange sponge-painted walls and burgundy bedding.

i need a change.

pics to come soon?

perhaps :)